All Terrain

So the 5k last night was in the mother-fucking FOREST. What?! Like beautiful non-humid night and lovely part of RI but seriously, roots and wood chips and rocks, ugh. And I should really train at least a little if I'm going to run. And maybe eat more than like a bagel in the day time. I finished last, 41:44. Ugh. But I did it, I ran the whole thing, I finished. Blah and Blah. I feel kind of sucky today but not as bad as I thought.

I did some arms tonight and ate too many cookies. I am done with my antibiotics so I can stop using that as an excuse to eat bread, bread and more bread. Work is becoming an issue, I need to stop going out to eat. That Bamboo isn't even good and is a diet-killer. And I'm supposed to be saving money. Ah, life. I still have my attitude problem, hopefully that will get better as I start to feel better.

I'm going to try and keep momentum going and run 4-5 miles tomorrow, I have no real weekends to myself until mid-September. And work will be insane by then. I am so annoyed by everyone and everything. Except Ed and those cookies and MTV programming. These are good things.

8/10

Tuesday, I got like 2 hrs of sleep last night. Heading to bed soon. Did my arms today despite my shoulder hurting this morning, what doesn't hurt on me right now? Still running a 5k in the hellish temps tomorrow at 6:30, not the greatest idea but I knew it would be August so I can't blame anyone but myself.

Ate ok, I like to take my meds with food so I allowed myself bread and bread and bread. I did however read my medical records online [or some of them] and less than 2 years ago I was 15 lbs lighter and I was pretty diesel [not in a good way then], so like really. Really. I just had cereal for dinner, what am i five? Ed made gross seasoned corn, I lasted 3 bites.

Fin.

Rough week

We had a week of visitors, it doesn't take much to sway me from exercising so I have done nothing pretty much since July. Nice.

Rode the bike for a half hr today and lifted my weights. One month till Meagan's wedding and I need at least a semblance of muscle tone in my arms. I should probably try the dress on at some point before September 9th? Add it to the list. I'm exhausted, it's hot, I'm in a funk. Today I'm sick on top of said-funk. Cooler temperatures will help, I keep telling myself, but I really need to just cut the bullshit and stop making excuses. Get more sleep, drink more water, DO NOT go out to eat unless it's REALLY worth it! Says she who just housed a hot dog bun [dipped in some melted butter sitting on the counter...it was seriously like 89 here today, and so muggy] at 2 am. In fairness, my antibiotics said take with food. Damn right I will....

Run and Lift

That's what I did, 2.5 miles and my arms, at like 6:30 am. I did not love it but I am proud I forced myself to get out of bed period and then I was considering cutting it short and I didn't. So score two for the gipper or whatever that is. And it was again soooo hot today so the early thing was a good move.

I ate awful, fine all day and then Ed brought home a croissant, I went out for a delicious panini and fries, and 2 fruity cocktails. The some JP Licks. I feel gross right now.

Tomorrow is another day.

Where oh where are my endorphins?

So I got up at 6 as promised and watered my plants and ran 2.5 miles AND did my arm exercises. And made a healthy breakfast and took down all the laundry, all before 9 am. Who am I? However, for the rest of the day I was hungry and spacey and now I had a teeny glass of bad white wine [so bad I had to mix it with oj, no joke] and am SO TIRED, I am drinking a diet coke in hopes of staying awake later than 8 pm. Ugh. When do I start feeling jazzed? When do I have energy in my life? And joy? When do I have one chin in pictures. Seriously, I think I look ok and then the goddamn macbook cameras PROVES otherwise, such a sharp smack to the face. Happy Monday!

Blase

Is that how you spell that? It's my general mind-set for, oh the entire summer. Nothing serious, just a combination of wanting to do nothing besides sleep, watch TV and eat pizza. Not the greatest for the 40 lbs I've decided I need to lose by March. New goal! Yes, I think we will get married in March, for our 7 year itch. I figure I can lose like 10 this summer and then maybe 15-20 in training for my November race. Then I just have 5-10 for the winter. Why is it so much easier to write down than actually do?

I rode the bike Friday night, I'm down to twice a week for any kind of exercise. I have done zero running since it's been so hot. Maybe like twice in the past month? And the eating....well, it's summer. Friday we had bread? And Saturday we had Coppa and today we had meat and cake [not together] for Ed's dad's b-day. So super healthy. I've been eating vegetables and drinking a lot of water [it is so hot, you can't help it], so those are two pluses. I'm going to try and get up and water the lawn and go running. We shall see!

Ddejncjsdncjjc

Again with the re-examining of life. I've been putting off blogging intentionally because I have to REALLY think of things I like besides Ed, my cat, my family, my bed, my iPhone and laptop, and eating. I am glad it's summer even if it is HORRENDOUSLY hot. Like bad. I did a 5k yesterday in 35:20, not awful. My legs kill today but I did 6 miles on the bike too. Getting it together but for now it is a suckfest.

I'm going to wuss out and go with TV shows I look forward to. So sad.
1. Locked Up Abroad
2. Mad Men
3. Dexter [wtf?]
4. Intervention
5. The Office. I have 2 seasons to catch up on now, will make for a lovely fall saturday.
Because I prob don't have a free Saturday until then, FML.

Beyond that, I look fat in Martha's wedding pix and I look fat in Daddy's pix from yesterday. Didn't stop me from carbo-loading today. Vicious cycle.

Also, starting the wedding plans, discreetly. I'll just figure it all out and tell Ed we're doing it. This is how we work.